Relax, Unwind, Unfold... Awaken into your Truth & Magic
WE ARe all born into a Story.
Some chapters we adore and cherish, others we might desire to re-write. If we are lucky, we learn how to open ourselves to the very lessons and experiences that we came for, moving into greater compassion and grace. With each step we learn to walk taller and more powerfuL, unswayed by the storms of our existence. Earthing into the magnificence and magic of each and every moment.
Perhaps I'll have the honor to hear your journey of heart warmth and ache, but for now here is a small view finder into the birth of Seeds of Satya and the magic created- a sweet package of love, deep gratitude, devotion and service to my sisters and brothers~Divine Mother and Father~ the unity of our multiplicity of Oneness.
Looking back my preparation for all that I do now, began at an early age. My life has been full of serendipitous and other worldly experiences, whispering in my ear that "things are not as they seem". As a child I saw, felt and knew that there was something unseen that was right there in front of me. I remember looking at my hands often sensing they were much larger than they looked, then I would sink into my body and it felt the same. It was a sense of an effervescent expansion, yet it was quite an opposite feeling from the density and limitlessness I felt all around.
Around the age of seven and throughout my adulthood, I began to have sleep paralysis, and very dark psychic energy attacks at night, as well as crazy experiences with earth bound spirits, yet no one to help me understand or process. I had many premonitions of coming events, very intuitive symbolic dreams, dreams that made me question past lives, and astral travels that relayed to me that things were not as they seemed.
In High School and all throughout College I felt bored, with a feeling that I was not where I was supposed to be, without a clue where I should be. Sitting at my desk ready for the bell to ring, I continually heard from within, "Follow your intuition. You will study what you are meant to do later in life". Socially there was a lonely pulse of anxiety within, a holding pattern of deep layers of ostracization and a desire to be introverted. Although I excepted everyone, and often found myself in counseling roles to peers, I socially kept to myself, yet fell into positions of authority pushing me to be more extroverted. Throughout my teens I struggled with deep seated body image issues, fears of becoming overweight, thus I exercised a lot, ate very little, and took diet pills that I now know were damaging to my health.
Professionally, there was a great desire to be of service and experience adventure during my off time. My jobs were various and full, working as a corporate personal trainer and health coach in college, a mental health counselor for high-risk children and adolescents. I was wilderness guide for all ages throughout the western and eastern United States. As a registered nurse, I worked with a diverse population of people in emergency surgical trauma in Tahoe, Oakland, San Francisco and Denver, from very wealthy to extremely poor and troubled, including the transvestite community and gang violent neighborhoods.
Seeing the major imbalances in the hospital with nature and true healing, inspired me to be an advocate of hospital sustainability and to write a Sustainability program for the University of Colorado Hospital. I volunteered to help refugees' from Burma in Thailand, which led to be a liaison between teachers and dislocated children from Burma in US. Throughout it all, I've had the honor to work with a vast group of people throughout my life who have experienced an array of different stories of suffering, which inevitably triggered the layers of wounding and heaviness within my own being, yet I was unaware of how to cultivate it. So it built and built within, but like the majority, I ignored the signs which brought me into greater spaces of imbalance.
Although at a young age there was a great desire to study more esoteric philosophies, a deeper call into the discovery of the true meaning and mystery of Jesus's life and teachings, for my Southern Christian upbringing did not have the answers I sought and fueled deep seated fear around such explorations. I had always felt that there was so much more to what Jesus was saying, yet was overlooked, hidden, and just not being talked about because it created dissonance in a faith based ideology. Thus my fast track into spiritual transformation began with a life altering experience that forced me to learn how to process,release and surrender to my conditioning and fears, or what is referred to in Buddhist and Yogic philosophy as samskaras, which are the deep impressions of habit created due to actions and speech speech known as karmas, which are all motivated by past memory.
I began to receive the teachings I was destined to learn spurred by a life threatening infection that now is known to have been secondary to stealth Lyme bacteria's and hospital super bugs. It was an infection that western medicine could not tame despite all the most potent IV antibiotics and numerous surgeries to rid the infection. Fear of death and dying as a new mother gripped me. For well over a month I was shown through various outer and inner body experiences the many dimensions at play within the personal and collective "reality", traveling into varying frequency zones of emotions and our multidimensional nature.
Eventually, the unrelenting painful suffering took me to my knees where I asked God... "If you want me to live, what am I to do with my life?". Immediately I heard "Become a Spiritual Counselor and follow all paths shown. It will lead you to Truth". This resulted in an almost immediate divine interventional healing and an Om sign of capillary refill that appeared on my right forearm. Days later I was greeted by serendipitous guidance into an already manifesting pathway into the teachings of our illusions and truth.
Do you feel the call to relax, unwind, unfold... Awaken Into Your Truth & Magic?
Follow your heart. Not your fear. I'm here to help and guide whoever is ready to leave the heaviness of their mind and open up to the magic and mystery that is within and all around.
SEEDS OF SATYA (Truth): Awaken Truth Within & Magic Without
A month after my dance with what felt like death, I experienced a new series of auspicious events. I was supposed to go into the Amazon to experience Ayahuasca with a Amazonian Shaman for two weeks in Peru, but I kept hearing from within that I did not need to do hallucinogenics to do this work, that I was to learn how to work without such medicines. I trusted my heart wisdom and cancelled my stay with the Shaman while in Cusco. My anthropological self was sad to miss out on an adventure, but the very next morning I met a Celestial Paqo in a restaurant who took the exact words from my heart confirming that my path was to learn without hallucinogenics. He then endowed me with an incredible healing on the streets of Cusco that stripped me of evangelical fears. I was forever changed.
Upon my return to the states, I was guided to Sacred Stream in Berkley, a school of consciousness where I received training to be a Depth Hypnosis Practitioner and Spiritual Counselor, which had an emphasis on shamanic healing and buddhist philosophies with Isa Gucciardi. During my years of study at Sacred Stream, I also completed an enriching program in yogic philosophy, asana and meditation at a yoga teacher training in Denver, CO. Shortly after my yogic training, I was blessed by an intense and spontaneous Kundalini Awakening where my spirit shot out into the cosmos. The intensity was so powerful that I knew in order to experience again, I would have to learn how to overcome all of my fears.
My next arrival was the practice of Kundalini Yoga by Yogi Bhajan, where I had many wonderful and auspicious experiences. Still practicing Kundalini I felt overwhelmed by the many choices. I desired one practice I could continually go to, which brought me the wonderful and simple technique of Kriya Yoga in the lineage of Mahavatar Babaji, which was gifted to the West by Paramahamsa Yogananada and now taught by the enlightened and embodied Guruji, Paramahamsa Prajnanananda, who I've had the deep honor to experience the magic and incredible mystery of a true living enlightened master.
I then completed a six month indigenous initiation at Sacred Earth Foundation, led by Pati Turner, which roused a deeper sense of truth and purpose, leading me to study with Contemporary and Indigenous Shamans from around the world, steeping me into a deeper relationship and trust. Then I was led to be in circle with Indigenous Shaman/Political Environmental Activist from Greenland~Angaangaq Angakkorsuaq, which fueled a wonderful series of mystery and magic, and empowered me to use my voice within my healing practice.
In the midst of all this, through meditation and a series of mysterious events, I was shown the way to ancestral sacred land that holds ancient universal tibetan termas where I take yearly sabbaticals to this sacred earth sanctuary to commune with Great Spirit in solitude on solo fasting vision quests. This place continues to teach me in soul catalyzing incredible wondrous ways.
A novel of learning and expansion continues, but all in all my greatest teacher has been the playground of life and the serene moments in stillness. I am grateful for all the incredible, not always easy, teaching moments, as well as the fountain of continual support I have received from the seen and unseen realms within my journey of following the path, "the way" of "Healer Heal Thyself". It has been renewal of rich lessons of how to unfold, dissolve and Be. Allowing the layers of untruths to unearth from within, so that the truth can penetrate every cell of being.
As for Seeds of Satya, I have to live into my purpose every single day in order to serve it. Buddha said, "Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without", then Jesus later said, "The Kingdom of God is within you". This is what Seeds of Satya was created to do- Awaken Truth Within and Magic Without, bridging the distance between the heart and mind.